I was never a big birth plan person. But I did take all the classes. D and I learned the various labor positions, relaxation techniques, how to move the baby, the stages of labor, all the different pain relief options, etc. etc. I was given entire books and illustrated diagrams about it. I agonized over whether I should hire a doula to trade shifts with D and handhold me through labor and tell me what to do and rub my back. UCSF was proud to inform me that their delivery suites were equipped with jet tubs, and that I was allowed to bring my own music, electric candles, and entourage of people, if desired. By the time I was 36 weeks, I was thoroughly convinced that labor was a very complicated process during which I would need much coaching and that I must be doing something wrong because my birth plan was basically "See how I feel, keep the anesthesiologist on standby, and above all, get the baby out safely." Of course, even by my simple standards, a picture-perfect birth experience was not what I got. Not by a long shot.
But you know what? Turns out labor itself was fucking easy! I could almost laugh - what the hell did I think I needed a doula for?
It's pregnancy that's hard. Nine long months of pregnancy, and taking care of a newborn, and raising a kid, or grieving a kid - that's what's hard. As far as I'm concerned, if you make it out of labor with a healthy baby and no major tearing, you should thank your lucky stars, and to hell with the perfectly choreographed birth plan.
My next birth plan is simple:
- Go to the hospital.
- Have a healthy baby.
- Bring home the baby.
I like your birth plan:) When I was in the hospital on bedrest with Sev, all the nurses told me that it was the women with the long birth plans whose births went haywire. Healthy baby, healthy mama, end of story.
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