Promises.

We wrote our vows kind of at the last minute, sitting at opposite ends of our hotel room at 11PM the night before our wedding, each quietly tapping at our laptops, while our friends were out getting smashed on piña coladas at Bahia Cabana across the street.

When I wrote my vows that night, I of course meant them deeply; but I did not expect that we would be faced with so much sadness so soon, less than two years after getting married.  It is such an unnatural tragedy, too - the death of a child, our first child.  It is deep and lasting.  It goes against the natural order of things.  It is so wrong.  I didn’t ever even consider that it might happen to us.

But here we are, and we are laughing and smiling and crying and feeling a little bit broken and loving each other through what I think is one of the hardest things that a couple can weather, together.  I am so lucky.

I, P, take you, D, to be my husband.
I promise that I will stand by you, care for you, and defend you.
I will be your rock and your friend.
I will travel with you and discover with you,
laugh with you and cry with you,
hold my heart open to you and love you,
through whatever joy and whatever sadness may come,
today and for all days. 

I, D, take you, P, as my wife.
I promise to be your biggest fan and your toughest critic.
Your strongest ally and your best friend.
I promise to make sure we laugh and smile together every day, even in the hardest of times.
To never let the little things distract us from what's important.
I will always share with you, love you, and take care of you now until the day I die.